Hi everyone! Our post today is by Nidhi Neeharika - who discusses the prevalence of sexist stereotypes in the Desi community. She talks about how important it is to we appreciate the individualistic beauty of different people, rather than centering on Western beauty standards.
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South Asian women and girls do not have the equivalent life advantage as their Western counterparts. Gender inequality and sexism is a pervasive problem that is firmly rooted in our history, which continues to influence South Asian women negatively. I don't think people understand how profound the issue of sexism is, but it's essential to realize that gender discriminatory practices are unacceptable.
Sexist attitudes and behaviors were always thrown upon me, particularly in my teenage years. It was expected that as a 'developing woman' I should be qualified to perform the responsibilities that females needed to in the South Asian Community. Frequently, sexist remarks were inflicted upon me, some of which include "your degree won't come in handy. You're a girl, and eventually, you will be married to a guy that you'll have to nurture, for the remainder of your lifetime." These consistent judgments were imposed against me by the more traditional generations of men and women. These statements would repeatedly upset, yet infuriate me. Consequently, making me feel as though these established gender norms and values contribute to the loss of the "female advantage."
I was continuously belittled by my inability to cook and clean the house because, as a female, it was my responsibility to do so. These sexist criticisms were then implemented against me and targeted towards my future.
Several critiques were made with people repeating "you would be a terrible daughter-in-law." OR "I feel sorry for your in-laws." However, something I find subjectively offensive is respecting women to an extent to treating them as a goddess in the South Asian community and still favoring gender discrimination is shocking. Women are by default, required to be in charge of household work even if they have agendas of work that are chaotic or sometimes more hectic than their male counterparts. They are supposed to do it alone, despite the presence of men who are equally accountable for joining.
From a young age, I was supposed to do basic household chores, whereas the boys in my family weren't given this opportunity. They had no duties and were treated oppositely all year round. They rarely did anything to keep the house neat, and it was the daughter/sister's job to clean up after them. However, this wasn't only forced upon me, but to the other girls in my family, that were often younger than me. I hopelessly tried convincing the majority of my family members to end the cycle of sexism and gender discrimination multiple times. But in my attempt to do so, I received several lectures that Westernization and liberalism ideologies have contributed to my sense of immodesty.
I can't help but think that I must change these beliefs in my family, but don't know how to go about it, as they are so unreceptive and close-minded.
"Log kya kahenge" (what will people say) is a very prevalent conversation that is regularly used against me when I'm unable to carry out the feminine roles expected. One of the most obnoxious experiences I encountered was when a male figure in my family said: "collect your brother's dirty dishes because you're a girl and, therefore, you should be doing this." I just recall staring at my brother, with the hope that he would take a stand against the sexist judgment that was made. Unfortunately, he didn't. This ultimately frustrated me because if the younger generation didn't take action on specific issues like this. The problem would simply continue in future generations and most likely never stop.
Although, we now live in a period where there are considerable changes in our way of life under the influence of modernization, westernization, industrialization and technical advancement, across the globe.
However, gender discrimination against women and girls still appears to be the standard principal variable that is still practiced.
Sadly, the belief that only women do the chores and cooking still lingers in my family. I am a feminist and will continuously find this irritating. But we must continue fighting to put an end to the problem of sexism and gender discrimination. It is essential to realize just how necessary feminism is in everyday life and how easy it is for people to live their lives and not learn they are being disrespectful or sexist. Though there is still an abundance of effort to do before men and women are treated equally in the South Asian community. Hence, I wish that females gain stronger self-confidence and help support other ladies to understand our full value.
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